the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
