the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Welp...herpes.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
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