Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
