so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize