I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I need a hoe opinion
go on
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
