she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
