quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
