party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
