how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
