he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
