I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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