found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
