wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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