Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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