just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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