He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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