Duck Duck Cougar?
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
My bed smells like the plague
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
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