wake up i wanna do it froggy style
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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