I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
