If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize