I showed him my bush... on skype.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
