Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
