The brown eye won't let me do that either.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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