Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
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