I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
