i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Randomize
