Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
