she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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