I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
