Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
