For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
