She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
