whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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