are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
