I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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