I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
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