Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
