I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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