Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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