I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
