He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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