Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
