you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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