Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
