covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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