I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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