so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
