I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
