remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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