3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize