My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
